.english please!.

a lot has been happening and to cut stories short, i have hanged my gloves in the shipping industry.

lets now go on to much exciting field of work.. the advertising world. yeay! i got the job finally..thanks to HottieSuz who passed my resume to the company. Yeay Yeay Yeay! Cant wait to start!

Anyways, it has been a pretty busy week and didnt get a chance to blog, and since today I woke up late and had a spinning headache and stomach pains, decided to ditch work and enjoy the day. ngeh ngeh.

Found an interesting new place to hang out now, which I have fallen in love with… Jaya One Starbucks. New surroundings, some cool cafe’s, WIFI.. Im in love! And while I was hanging out in Starbucks, I received (sorry honeh boneh.. i really found it funny) a text message asking me for a favour to translate (which i foung more to deciphering.. =P ) a text message.. and here it goes :

“Lum Lg, ok i wnt to go now 2 gme, nxtme kta msg lg k, anyway thnks sdi msg i.. Tker”

What the hell? Berterabur habis. and on top of that.. who the fuck writes Take care as “Tker” ? HAHAHAHA.

Had a good laugh about it with jiran and uncle d.

its 2251 and amazingly im going to sleep. ta~

kawan kawan (yet to be updated)

after my two packed interviews for the afternoon, came down to kl sentral to get a connecting train to bangsar.. but changed my mind and met up my kek-bayi (hahaha kepada yang terasa). so while i was talking to her, something came up to my mind and i thought it was quite interesting to blog it out.

and now to the point of discussion, there are a few types of friends..and according to my definition, let me elaborate a lil..

Kawan Kawan NGO (Non-Profit Friends)

Kawan Kawan Politik

Kawan Kawan Bisnes

**iklan since UncleDids took away my laptop so that she can go into her facebook fights**

and now qookie’s back (after 15 mins).. and i forgot about what the hell am i suppose to write. fug.

well, the definitions has to come another day then.

crap. mebbe the thought will come back to me tmr morning since i’ve kinda started on the waking up at 6am bit just for the sake of checking my facebook stuff before i head on to work.. yea. finally i started to wake up 2 hours before my usual sleeping time to be online. gile.

 

lost attitude

its funny that at one moment of time, you can just drop everything and lose interest in everything that you hold dearly?

funny i felt the same.

today made me realized that for the past 1 week, i just cant seem to care less about my surroundings. i was in a few squabbles, and by being in dem..usually i would be all bitchy and provoked and stuff. but no. what i did was.. posing a blank face and say “this is just ridiculous to put in effort to be angry over stuffs”.. and i walked away.

it felt good.

so lets see until when this attitude will last, and i hope it will. its high time for qookie to think more about herself and not to think about others who doesnt appreciate. i guess its true what you said (quoted by somebody who said it to me which i kinda felt a little hurt but heck).. i am a bloody doormat to the selective few. pergi mampus.

ZZZZZZzz

definitely maybe

just got back from watching a movie entitled definitely, maybe.

its supposed to be a romantic comedy, but somehow somewhat i find the movie sad. as in its a good movie but sad content lah. one part of the script which actually made me started to actually tear (and i dont usually do this) was:

“well dad, now i know why it is complicated because at the time that april wants you, you wanted summer and at the time that you want april, april was with kevin and in the end nobody loves you”

it hurts when you dont have that special someone to love you back as much as you want them to. a friend told me to leave a space for what if’s or maybe. be patient a little. but when it comes to a human’s heart, we’re never too patient are we not?

to some of the readers of this post (and i know who you are), you may think that why are mostly sappy or whatever. too bad, qookie is a hopeless romantic and have always been wanting to spread the love to the one who needs it. but who? =P

im done with this at the moment. thank god boxing starts tommorow and hopefully my mind will be channeled to something else. need to focus back to what i love most : family, friends and gymming (well, had to leave the photography thing out since i dont have anymore camera aye? =( )

now, back to work..blergh.

taken away

something which i most treasured for the past 1 year has been taken away from me. something which made it start as a hobby, turned passion and turned something which is kind of into a profession. my babies was taken away from me early this morning. yes. My cameras. My D40 Nikon DSLR and Canon Ixus 50 was taken away by dem stupid burglars. fuck them. fuck fuckety fuck them.

Please excuse me if there is a lot of swearing going about in this post. but do excuse me. i think i deserve a day to be ranting/whining/grieving over the matter. so here goes:

i hope that fucker would get hit by a car, or a lorry or even better a crane.. trampled on, stabbed or whatever it takes to make sure he get paid for what he took. big fucking mother fucker.

ah. am tired thinking about it. yesterday was about having hope in the topic of love. my camera and photography was a big part of my life, which was something that i was hanging on to keep myself calm and relieved. it was a good way for me to not think about stuff and enjoy what i do. taking photographs was my passion and my love grew for it.  so should hope be all lost? and now, does the q on should we hope on love still be there. ARGH. AAARGH. fuck that now. i dont know what i can have to replace that void now. if i look at flickr on my photos, i want to cry. even to look at my blog header..i cry.

it takes time to heal. i know i can do it. thanks to all for your text messages. love you all to bits.

hope

somehow today the day did not started right.

i felt like i lost hope. a chat on gtalk which took place today. (karekter telah diubah nama untuk melindungi identitinya dari diketahui ramai. keh keh keh)

me: COSMIC
       sorry la.
       gersang hati ini tibe2

cosmic: gersang? mengapa?

me: kerana perasaan hendakkan seseorang
  am i just being annoying or whut?

cosmic : well, don’t put too much hope babe

me: yea i know
  dont put on too much of hope on anything.be hopeless
  better kan
  hahah

 cosmic : have hope.
  but on the right thing.
  on the certain things

me: how about hope on love.

cosmic : hope on love, yes.

me: hope on the people that you fall in love with?

cosmic : hurm
 that is the hardest thing you will learn endlessly how to avoid hoping for
  I have lost that hope

me: well im usually hopeful. but it hurts to be hopeful.
  but thats what keeps making me going on strong
  i wish ive got the will to lose hope
  life is easier that way

 cosmic: it does hurt to be hopeful. I am still hopeful nonetheless
  but I have no faith that someone will truly fall in love with me
  tu je

 me: owh
  in that case
  we’re on the same page
  fuck
  benci la perasaan ini

cosmic: be patient my child
  hehehe

mebbe this body of mind is reacting this way because im just tired of being hopeful. mebbe the reason which puts me in this glum situation is about love. what to do la kan cosmic, we librans are indeed born lovers. =P

                         

Screaming for the sunset.

RUMI

gosh. ive got so much to write. but i dont know what to write. mahha.

on monday we were talking about love. on monday i was introduced to RUMI thanks to abby. seriously babe, the more i talk to you is the more im falling in love with you..HAHAHAHA. not that way la ah? salah tu. kekekeke. but yea, it was terrific that i have finally found someone who knows what im feeling and what are the odds of us having the same horoscope, born on the same year and i do have to agree with you that we actually can finish each others mind sentence. bhawawa. Anyways, been googling on RUMI, and for today, one which caught my eye :

“When you are with everyone but me, you’re with no one. When you are with no one but me, you’re with everyone. Instead of being so bound up with everyone be everyone. When you become that many, you’re nothing. Empty.”

One more:

Oh Beloved,
take me.
Liberate my soul.
Fill me with your love and
release me from the two worlds.

If I set my heart on anything but you
let fire burn me from inside.

Oh Beloved,
take away what I want.
Take away what I do.
Take away what I need.
Take away everything
that takes me from you

Babes. seriously. am a fan of RUMI now, big time.

 

a handsfull

i.just.dont.get.it.

things.are.not.right.

why.am.i.feeling.this.way.

qookie.is.getting.tired.of.the.attitude.

people get bored of other people.

people get hurt by other people.

people do not understand other people.

people wants other people to understand them.

screw dem people.

why cant we all be cats or dogs instead.

easier. no agenda, no hyprocrites, do drama. just looking for food, sleep and playtime.

 

post gelap session

decisions decisions decisions.

now its all about making up decisions. but i have still until tommorow to decide. argh!

went for a golf session with my general manager earlier, and we had a good chat. but like other times where things were promised did not materialize, im just scared if the decisions im going to make will in the end make me waste my time. yeesh.

and after todays session and talks, i just realized.. in the company there are a lot of people which cannot be trusted, and theres a lot of people who are wishing for your downfall or just want you to not suceed. fuck those people. fuck em. fuck! if it was not for that one person, by now i would have been head of the department in a branch office. and because of that person, i am not. YEESH.

well, lets not spoil a good sunday afternoon yah. gonna go enjoy a good plate (should i say plate?) or leaf of rice..

ayam goreng..oh. ayam goreng.

morning

this is my earliest that ive posted.. bloody 640am. stupid golf game.

and what i need to just write to start the day is :

“its not all about you, the world does not revolve around you. what you make is what you are. so be it.”

sapa termakan cili, batuk la sampai tercekik. haha.

good morning and have a happy sunday.